Rhododendrons vs reality

Now I know how those grand counts came
I have just one word — shame.
A figment sold as firmament
A fallacy I failed to fathom
A dream I never knew I’d dread
A love that was never born, what dead!

I spoke about signs all along
Sang your song
Made right of your wrong
While what made you stick
Was something you called in your language, ‘click, trick, kick’?

And now, nothing moves the pen like pain
And I suddenly see what you meant
It wasn’t What If but What F
Not Nefertiti — Nevertiti.
That one time you declared me ‘Better Half’
And turned out the Bitter Half.

To you, it was a deed. Perhaps a need.
To me, a seed. To you, a weed.
I partied in fool’s paradise
While you were waiting to break hell
How, I still wonder, can a heart hardsell?

All those tunes you hummed
The profound parallels you drew
None were ever for me
I so wish I knew!

You walked me in wonderland and left for the world midway
No tears shed the burden, no more lies save the day
And know what’s the worst part?
You fall from the pedestal, but it is I that die.

I chose, I rose, and you pushed me to the fall
Maybe just another trick in the wall
But I’m glad the truth still stands tall.